I for one welcome our new porcelain overlords

For mere thousands of dollars, the Intelligence Toilet system will measure urine sugar, blood pressure, body fat and weight on a daily basis.

(via Gizmodo.)

Demons in my toilet

Kent, England (AHN) — A Kent librarian who claims a ghost has been flushing his library’s toilet is seeking the help of an exorcist in having the unwanted spirit evicted. A 14-year librarian at the Gravesend Library, Gordon Jenns, 61, says the ghost flushes the toilet when he thinks everyone’s gone home. (via My Hero of the Day.)

This guy, perhaps?

Pissoir Poisson

Is that a fish or a number or calculation or a place to relieve oneself?

Walling by ~Jambones

Rocket Powered Toilet

"The SS Flusher"
Rocket Powered Toilet
America's secret weapon built in 2001 powered by a 1000 lb thrust Hybrid Rocket Motor. The rocket motor starts when you push the flush button.

via inappropriate rocket powered items

Tentacled Toilet Seat

Painted toilet seat via Pharyngula

More painted toilet seats

The internet is coming up the toilet

TE Data Toilet signs by ~msalah

The idea of laying fibre along sewer lines has been sloshing around the networking business for years. Now a UK firm claims today's broadband will seem a trickle compared to the torrents of data it'll soon offer.

It's always been hard to argue with the logic. Sewers are deep underground where cable would be protected from clumsy drilling. They also run into the heart of virtually every building in Britain.

Best of all, they were dug in the 19th century when Irish labour was cheap, and planning and safety restrictions were lax. You've just got to buy cable that the rats can't gnaw into.

It all works in theory, and Merseyside-based H2O Networks says it's finally cracked the practical stuff. The good burghers of either Bournemouth, Dundee or Northampton will be first to ride the 100Mbit/s wave with fibre to their homes with plans to complete the first of three "Fibrecity" deployments within three years.

The final decision on who'll get the maiden rollout is set for April and will be made by whichever council gets its works permissions sorted first, according to H20 Networks managing director Elfred Thomas. Engineers should be on the ground in September, and work will be completed in 18 months to two years, he said. The 100Mbit/s figure is claimed as a minimum.

It's taken six years to get this far. "The negotiations with water companies are never easy," Thomas said.

Laying the trunk cables along sewer mains should be the easy part for the engineers - the majority of the schedule will be devoted to taking the lines into homes. "The key factor is making sure we're in every home," Thomas said.

H2O has already connected up university and council buildings in Bournemouth and Dundee via the sewers to prove its pitch.

The plan is for H2O as consumer provider to run the fibre networks as a wholesaler. It claims to be in "advanced talks" with ISPs and major TV providers to offer access to consumers. Thomas anticipates the cost of internet access via the sewers to be about the same as other broadband platforms, with extra services available on top.

Government, BT and Ofcom discussions on how to speed up the rest of the country's internet infrastructure are no threat to the plans, Thomas insists. "Subsidies ain't gonna happen," he said. "We're just getting on with it and we don't need any government funding."

It's estimated that each of the three initial Fibre Cities (towns, really) will cost between £15m and £20m.

The timing of the announcement assures public interest in H2O's proposition. The mainstream press has noticed in the last few months that the UK is starting to look increasingly complacent, as European and international rivals invest in speedy internet infrastructure.

Ofcom's consultation on the UK's way forward, launched in September, too heavily praised its own success in fostering competition in the existing flaky ADSL market for many tastes.

A freshly-dug ubiquitous national fibre network would come in at about £15bn, it's reckoned. BT isn't going to stump up for that alone, preferring to limit its fibre investment to new builds where it's cheap, planning consent is in the bag, and nobody complains when you dig up the road.

Indeed, the popular view in the broadband business is that the next generation networks we'll use to get online in the future will be a patchwork of cellular, wireless, fibre, and DSL technologies.

Cynics remind us that sewer fibre was last contemplated seriously by a gaggle of dark fibre startups during the dotcom boom, who insisted the bandwidth would be needed imminently, and could be sold at a high price. They were all flushed out when the results of the broader greedfest hit the pan.

Maybe the sewer fibre evangelists were just stung by putting supply before demand last time round. Now there's BitTorrent, IPTV, YouTube, booming online gaming, and (judging by the email we get) a net populace increasingly frustrated by bandwidth-throttling, "unlimited" marketing and other chicanery employed by ISPs to beat a living out of the 20th century tubes.

We hope the current economic climate doesn't portend a dotcom fate for H2O's ambitions. If nothing else it'll keep us all in puns for years, and give the last laugh to Senator Ted Stevens: the internet really will be a series of tubes. Sort of. ®

100Mbit/s sewer broadband rollout coming your way

Luba's Arab Toilet

Don't forget to vote for the 6 Degrees of Casey Serin to Hillary Clinton winner!

Smells like flowers

Smells like flowers by ~Turkexa

a shrine of sorts by ~moa-ozis

Wrapped in Toilet Paper

fearsome by ~sarawontshutup

For toilet museum, a final flush is avoided

early toilet paper

Watertown soon to house cache

WORCESTER - If there was ever a man who could appreciate a good toilet, it is Russell Manoog.

more stories like thisHe has dedicated the last 20 years to collecting toilets, as well as sinks and other accoutrements of indoor plumbing, the way other men collect golf shirts, trophy wives, or fine cars.

The result is the American Sanitary Plumbing Museum, a roadside oddity in Worcester known to many as simply the "toilet museum" and a historic showcase of the way we used to live, wash, bathe, and, of course, relieve ourselves.

But now - for Worcester, anyway - it's all circling the drain. With Manoog, 73, and his wife, Bettejane, 72, looking to do a little more traveling and a little less talking about toilets, they are closing their Worcester location in March, moving the museum to Watertown shortly thereafter, and relinquishing some control over their vast collection of porcelain, brass, and cast-iron artifacts.

"We're sad, of course," Bettejane Manoog said yesterday.

But the Manoogs didn't expect others to be sad, too. After all, only about 400 people checked out the facilities last year. As news of the move reached locals in Worcester yesterday, however, they scram bled to visit the museum, proving yet again the powerful hold that the toilet has on the human brain. When faced with the thought of not having a toilet - or in this case, a toilet museum - nearby, we find ourselves feeling the urge to, you know, go.

"Bathrooms were something that people didn't talk about 100 or 200 years ago," said Russell Manoog yesterday, smoking a pipe in a room filled with toilets. "The outhouse was out there, and it was there to serve a need, a physical need.

But today the bathroom in modern homes is probably the most, or second most, expensive part of your home. So instead of hiding it in the back of the house, it's right in front. . . . It has gained a prominence."

Charles Manoog, Russell's father, founded the family's wholesale plumbing supply business in 1927. His son, who graduated from Harvard University in 1956, ultimately returned home to join him. And together they ran the business until his father retired in 1979.

As a parting gift, Charles Manoog received a segment of wooden pipes that had linked Jamaica Pond to Quincy Market in Boston in the late 1600s - a rare treasure. And from there, the collection grew until finally, in 1988, the American Sanitary Plumbing Museum was born, quickly becoming a quirky claim to fame in Worcester, along with the yellow "smiley face" invented in 1963 by a local designer.

"It's really something that's kind of a conversation starter when you say you're the home of the plumbing museum - home of the smiley face and the plumbing museum," said Jeannie Hebert, the tourism and marketing director for the Central Massachusetts Convention and Visitors Bureau, "It's really something that's kind of endearing to all of us."

People came to see the "earth closet," circa 1860, a primitive contraption that used soil, not water. They came to see the "cast iron pan closet," circa 1830, which, lacking an effective way to clean the pan itself, was one of the earliest and least sanitary receptacles. And they came to see the other treasures as well: the first dishwasher, called the "Electric Sink"; an elaborate, decorative toilet from the late 19th century; and the Manoogs' vast collection of pipes.

Now it is all bound for Watertown, where it will be reassembled and reopened for the public in April or May at the offices of J.C. Cannistraro LLC, a large mechanical contracting company that employs 400 people.

Inevitably, some jokes will follow, concedes Hugh Kelleher, executive director of the Plumbing-Heating-Cooling Contractors Association of Greater Boston. Anytime you're dealing with plumbing, Kelleher admits, the humor always offers "a sort of scatological angle."

But Kelleher, who's going to be a trustee of the new museum along with the Manoogs, said people need to remember one thing before cracking jokes about indoor plumbing.

"If those systems go down, civilization rapidly deteriorates," he said. "The day water stops coming out of the tap is the day civilization starts to crumble."

short hopper on standard

American Sanitary Plumbing Museum Set

Bizarre Urinals

Weird Toilets Urinals and Sinks from Around the World

Mr. Fartman

via Neatorama

More Porta Potty Pranks!

via Wagga

porta potty prank




UPDATE! Edgar, why don't you appear as a contributor any longer?

Our Troops in Iraq Having Fun

Porta Potty Prank In Iraq
Hat tip to Wagga for this one.

The Perfect Location for a Facial Cutting

Next time I cut my face I plan to use a restroom in Phuket too!

Crazy Japanese popup potty!

Another Wagga contribution...


Crazy Japanese Port-O-Potty Prank

A Cephalopod Friendly Toilet

How about an octopus or a koi on your toilet?

Pimp my toilet!
I rather like this comment on the post as well:
natalie said...
ooohh- i love that somebody finally thought differently about the toilet. i am soooo fed up with the "transparent-fish-and-shells-in-perfect-harmony"-crap , where the only creativity is changing the color of the fish and material...
January 17, 2008 4:24 AM

Pussy on the Potty

"more pussy on the potty" via Wagga

pipi via chicksnbreasts - hot girls, sexy pictures and videos

I wouldn't mind one of these in my bathroom

Tuesday Cohen's hand-painted toilet seats via Hand Painted Toilet Seats - Sièges de Toilettes Peints a la Main

National Continence Management Strategy

Not only does Australia have a National Public Toilet Map, but - as Wagga has noted - a Bladder & Bowel Website, a product of a "Take Control" initiative of the National Continence Management Strategy. They seem to have some awfully creative government employees in that country.
How to take a shit: While you should always avoid rushing, it is generally accepted that you should take only a minute or so to empty your bowel. Never strain or hold your breath. Haemorrhoids (or piles) can result from straining. So get into the habit of using a good toilet position. Lean forward while sitting on the toilet, with a straight back and your forearms on your thighs. Your feet should be raised so that your legs are angled slightly upward and away from your body. A footstool may help you to find the best angle.
WTF?

Katya's Toilet

Ron Paul Bathroom Graffiti

Where's the Toilet? is an interesting site that reviews restrooms as if they were restaurants or hotels. Too bad they don't review them in my area.

Like the PSL Service Plaza, the bathrooms here are shaped like a U, with the sinks along the base and two rooms of urinals and stalls making up the legs of the letter. The men's room can accommodate about 30 people at a time, give or take. The women's room, judging from what my companion told me, can hold about half that.
It's a Teutonic place, with dark tiles covering the floor and bland gray tiles on the wall. White sinks, white urinals and white toilets, with black stall doors separating them.
I visited this plaza twice, both out of necessity. The first visit was in early afternoon, during which the place was overrun by tour buses and tourists, and as a result it was a horrible experience through and through. There were so many people there that the bathroom felt like a subway station at rush hour -- people pushing and shoving just to stand their ground and not lose their place in line. Kids were running around everywhere, jumping into and splashing around in the various liquids found on the floor and throwing towels and trash about.
I managed to score on a stall on this visit instead of a urinal and found it horrifically dirty -- the floor was covered in urine, mis-thrown toilet paper and bits of feces (no kidding). And the stall doors had a considerable amount of graffiti on them, including a very prominent hand-written advertisement for third-party presidential candidate Ron Paul. I didn't think the endorsement was very flattering, but I guess it does show where Paul's influence can be felt.
More

Inked Vixen in the Bathroom

Wagga's contribution from Inked Vixen Getting Naked in the Bathroom

National Public Toilet Map

Those wacky Australians have created a map of all public toilets with various search features. If you ever find yourself down under with internet access but no toilet, all you need to do is plug in your address. Sweet!

Toilet Prank

Wagga's latest contribution to "edgar's potty":

Public Restroom with Fishnets on the Floor

More illusionary public bathroom ads

Setting The Story Straight On The Merrill Bonus Rage
Earlier this afternoon, CNBC’s Charlie Gasparino reported that some guy in Merrill Lynch’s fixed income research group had “inappropriately relieved” himself in protest of the downsizing of his bonus. Merrill has officially explained that this was simply an unfortunate accident, and then the bank turned red and scurried to the other side of the room.
We’ve been digging into this story because the way it’s told by the delicate souls at CNBC, it’s way to vague. What worse, the vagueness is giving rise to rumors that are totally untrue. It's fast becoming the Wall Street equivalent of an urban legends. Here’s what didn’t happen: a guy did not urinate on his desk because he was “pissed off.” The real story is so much worse.
In the first place, it wasn’t piss. It was shit. DealBreaker can confirm this much. After that the details get a bit fuzzy. The way we first heard it is that a guy took a dump in the rest room, stomped in it, and then dragged it all over the place by walking around with it on his shoes. Merrill’s story is that there was “an unfortunate accident” in one of the stalls—which we take to mean that some guy smeared his shit all over the bathroom because how the Hell could you miss the toilet—and that another person inadvertently stepped in it and tracked it all over.
So now you know.

New York City's $100,000 Toilet

Indeed, the toilet calls to mind not a port-o-let, but rather the sort of room one imagines adjoined the personal quarters of Capt. James T. Kirk on the Starship Enterprise. It is a 25-cent journey to the future — and, almost secondarily, a not unpleasant restroom.

The restroom was unveiled on Thursday, the first of 20 planned for the city after more than 30 years of false starts and frustrations. It faces Madison Avenue just north of 23rd Street, and at first glance looks like a bus stop shelter.

There are two architectural flourishes, both on the roof: a small pyramid of glass, like a little model of the Louvre, and an anachronistic metal stovepipe, reminiscent of a cozy shanty or an old outhouse with a crescent moon carved into the door.

But no one goes to a bathroom to look at it. When the green light marked “vacant” is lit, 25 cents — coins only, no bills — starts the visit.

What follows is possibly the longest and most awkward 20 to 30 seconds of a person’s day. The door slips open like an elevator, but then it stays open, to accommodate those who need extra time getting in. Meanwhile, men and women in suits walk past. It is very difficult to look inconspicuous in a bathroom on a sidewalk in New York with the door open. There is just nothing to do but stand there. And the delay will not please those who are in distress.

Finally, the door closes, and the first surprise is the quiet. The walls are padded to dampen street noise, leaving just the hum of a little fan overhead.

Six little lights and the skylight in the pyramid cast a neutral glow over the user’s home for the next 15 minutes, the maximum time limit.

This toilet, which cost more than $100,000, is very spacious, large enough to accommodate a wheelchair. One cannot touch the side walls with arms outstretched.

Greetings, Earthlings. Your New Restroom Is Ready.

Voter Roll

Do Ayatollahs Fart?

I had asked, “This couch is an important piece of furniture to this woman, not because of the history behind it, but because it has been touched by the Ayatollah. Now the question is, knowing that the Ayatollah was a very old man, is it not possible that he had to pass his gas, right on the couch, at least once?” I had continued, “Now, the question is, how many of these worshipers do you think will not slap you on the face if you tell them that someone has farted on this holy couch?”
Do Ayatollahs Fart? Kamangir (Archer) - کمانگیر

The Mr. Whipple Of Pakistan

Internet Weekly

Bush Iraq War Propaganda Poster

Republicans from Outer Space was pretty funny too.
Had to include this one since it's vaguely toilet related:

Luba on the Toilet

More of Luba's bathroom over at Zillow Book.

Thermocromatic and Tacky Toilet Seats

“Being able to identify a public toilet seat that has just been sat upon (and is thus still warm) is of particular concern to a significant number of the population. Without warning, one can easily sit upon a seat and be instantly repulsed by the trace evidence of a previous user. Conversely, if one is looking for intimate contact with an anonymous stranger without the associated awkwardness of verbal discourse, one could seek out the warm toilet seat. The decision to sit or not to sit is facilitated by the colour change of the seat: orange=cool, yellow=hot. The object retains the heat memory of a previous user and displays it as a visual marker for the next user to assess.”
Thermochromic Toilet Seat

The tackiest toilet seats